May 2013
Me: How do people think pyramid head is hot??
Me: HE DOSNT EVEN HAVE A FACE... OR A VOICE
Friend: bitches love the scalene triangle
Me: ...what?
Friend: ah. the scalene triangle.
Me: GOD DAMN IT NO
The Seven Shittiest Sins
Greed: I want shit
Envy: I want your shit
Wrath: I'm going to wreck your shit
Lust: I'm into some freaky shit
Gluttony: This is some tasty shit
Sloth: I don't feel like doing shit
Pride: I am the shit
dickfaerie:
adding a period on the end of everything makes it sound sarcastic
lol.
haha.
youre so funny.
youre so hot.
of course i dont hate you.
officialalltimelow:
peevesies:
i went down to the middle school today for relay for life and i saw my old social studies teacher i had a crush on (don’t talk to me) and he was like “hey how are you i haven’t seen you in ages?” and the first thing i blurted out was “I JUST TURNED 18” and jesus christ if that’s not the thirstiest thing i’ve said in my whole life
This will literally be me in a...
theonesock:
garlic-breadgasm:
YOU DON’T OWE YOUR PARENTS ANYTHING
IT WAS THEIR CHOICE TO HAVE, KEEP AND RAISE YOU BUT IT WASN’T YOUR CHOICE TO BE THEIR CHILD
ANY EXPECTATIONS OR IDEALS THEY TRY AND ENFORCE ON YOU ARE BULLSHIT IF YOU DO NOT AGREE WITH THEM
THEY SHOULD ACCEPT THEIR CHILD AS THEY ARE NOT JUDGE THEM ON A MINOR DETAIL THAT DOESN’T AFFECT THEIR LIFE
DO NOT FEEL BAD IF YOU AREN’T...
tardisity:
The oldest person alive was born on April 19, 1897, meaning that April 18th, 1897 was approximately the last time the Earth was inhabited by an entirely different set of people and if you don’t think that’s the realist shit ever then you can get right on outta town.
theangelgabrieldidmyhair:
Yahoo people taking an actual look at the site they just bought
foodchewer:
*hides good snacks from family members*
bloodyharpoonssherlock:
I just want to be a reclusive writer who lives underneath a table in a little-known coffee shop. I would appear out of nowhere and scare customers by correcting their terrible grammar.
I would be
The Phantom Of The Coffee Shop
winchester-inc:
deanisanactualprincess:
mistercoventry:
“Oh, you’re straight? So is spaghetti until it gets hot. ;)”
Are you suggesting we boil heterosexuals
is that what happens on hannibal?
yes
big-booty-itches:
when your parents ask you to help them with technology
Denmark
katyissuperwholocked:
superwhoavengehobbitpotterlock:
You are allowed to drink when you’re 16.
You are allowed in clubs when you’re 18.
You receive free education.
You receive economic support while studying.
You enjoy free hospitalization.
You’ll be correctly informed by objective news channels.
egberts:
of all the dumb stuff i did when i was younger at least i can proudly say i was never a fan of annoying orange
side effects of being friends with me include gaining extensive knowledge of tv shows you dont watch or care about
Me: *sees book store* *looks to friend* *shuffles towards bookstore*
Friend: no.
johnegbertsarms:
hoenheiny:
julietrosedoctor:
man-in-the-moonmoon:
zackisontumblr:
friends with overprotective parents
friends with parents who dont give a shit about them and so they feel worthless (even though are beautiful in every way)
friends whose parents put them under so much pressure and make them feel like a burden to the family and call them stupid and a disgrace to...
tinkervrisk:
physical education more like pointless embarrassment
1o14:
i want world peace but there are people i want to kill first
sfux:
i feel like people who eat breakfast really have their lives together
initiala:
A little girl in my 4th grade class came up to me after recess and said, “I got married at recess!” and I said “Oh? I didn’t know anyone was ordained under the age of twelve.” and she asked me what ordained meant and I explained and then she said “Oh, well, no, my wife and I were married by the slide, but we’ll be happy together anyway.”
So apparently on school playgrounds, slides are...
i-o-u-an-assbutt:
iamaproudsuperwholockian:
counting-to-one-hundred:
APPARENTLY ACCORDING TO CBC NEWS TUMBLR IS KNOWN FOR “Foul language and nude photos”
REALLY? THATS ALL? WHY NOT THE AMAZING ARTISTS? THE SOCIAL JUSTICE? EVEN THE PHOTOGRAPHS ON THE SO CALLED “HIPSTER BLOGS”
WE ARE MORE THAN JUST FOUL LANGUAGE AND NUDE PHOTOS. WE ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT
Are we?
yes we fucking are...
cofeecigarettes:
cj-twig:
i want kids but i dont wanna be pregnant or give birth but i dont wanna adopt either because i want them to be mine do you see my problem
basically you want to be a father
this is the most accurate thing i ever read
